Poots and Yoohoos

- Josh Howard has come to a tipping point. If he doesn't break out of his post 2006 finals funk this year, the media has won, and he will ride the washed up express through the rest of his career. If he decides to take his political/ganjafarian momentum and translate it to a Mavericks turn-around season, then we have a crusader on our hands folks, a true warrior.

- I can't say i have disagreed with the L. Ron Hubbard of Poot"s World very many times, however your last post Mr. Gotti, has me questioning your NBA viewing habits... All of the boys on your NBA "must-watch", aside from Monta, the 2 Smiths, and Calderon are old news. I could see wanting to see Gilbert because you never know if you are going to get: diety or douche taking teams final shot after going 1-14 from the field. My issues are with Lebron, who you will have plenty of time to watch come playoff time (same goes for Rondo), and Dwight Howard who's dunks are the only reason to watch aside from him stealing his teammates rebounds. Gerald Wallace could be explosive this year, so i can't say anything about that, but Poot, I have to make a case for my top 10, which may be more of a let down come april, but should keep you glued during the first few months... Watch out for the Kevins, give me your opinion Poot.

10. Kevin Love
9. Kevin Martin
8. Greg Oden
6. Jerryd Bayless
5. Dwyane Wade
4. OJ Mayo
3. Adam Morrison
2. Kevin Durant
1. Monta Ellis

-Can someone with technical expertise stretch the banner... maybe he who's name i refuse to utter... oh and regarding that same person, Tyler Thigpen Kansas City's 3rd string QB is playing and is cheap, i would suggest picking him up, he looks great.

Odds And Ends

Things that have been on my mind over the last couple weeks...

*USC could perform quite well in the NFC West.

*Patrick Willis is a man, the rest of the NFL are boys.

*My Top 10 Players To Watch This NBA Season (not based on skill, just who I'd switch the channel to watch).

10. J.R. Smith
9. Rajon Rando
8. Jamaal Tinsley (when healthy)
7. Dwight Howard
6. Monta Ellis
5. Gilbert Arenas
4. Jose Calderon
3. Lebron James
2. Gerald Wallace
1. Josh Smith

*At this point, I think I'd rather watch Mike and Mike in the Morning on ESPN 2 than any MLB game.

*It looks like the Pacers are stuck with Jamaal Tinsley according to ESPN experts. If by stuck, you mean having the most creative point guard of the last 10 years, than yes, they are stuck.

America's Team

Well, those fortunate enough to watch Monday Night Football, and there apparently were a lot of us, were in for a treat. It was a high scoring, back 'n' forth, nail biter, that featured plays both brilliant and boneheaded, and ultimately resulted in the good guys wining! Dallas is looking quite good this year, keeping their biggest weapons from last year and adding some new ones. Additionally, bringing in Adam 'No longer Pacman' Jones, who's only been arrested a few times and involved in just ONE shooting, should improve the team's sometimes questionable image.



This game was particularly interesting for me since I literally had over half my fantasy roster playing in the game (in retrospect I probably should have dropped the Eagles D, although it did make it a little easier to handle Romo handing the Eagles the ball in the end zone). Of course the play of the night belonged to Mr. Jackson. What's stupider than negating your FIRST NFL touchdown by throwing away the ball at the 1 yard line in a premature celebration? Doing it for the second time in your career! The best part is that Westbrook scored the TD on the next play, so instead of sharing the TD fantasy points with Alex, I got them by myself. My plan of crushing Alex's fantasy football spirit (which involved a seacret trip to Argentina, in order spy on him while he chose his picks and declared his favorite player) is well under way!

A Letter to Nasa

Dear Nasa,

An employee of yours who goes by the initials MP, wrote me 1 year and 3 months ago asking me to fill out a form rating his "trust" and background credibility. At the time, it had been 4 years since he had maliciously blocked one of my diving board trick shots, 3 since he had denied me a Dr. Pepper at his house (forcing me to bring my own 6 pack of Pepsi over), and 2 since he had won the Sportingnews basic fantasy league by stealing my players. Well, to tell you the truth, i haven't seen the guy in a while, and when he suggested doing the league again I couldn't refuse a good old fashioned mano y mano showdown... To my surprise today your employee had Darren McFadden along with receiver Deshaun Jackson starring in his line-up which continues his master plan of basic fantasy dominance. As follows: pick 2 of Alex's best players, one of them being his favorite, thus destroying his morale, and keeping him from gaining any ground on his Tony Romo star-studded squad... Nasa, I just want you to know I am revoking my competitive faith in this man because it has been 4 times too many that my players mysteriously end up on his team. I have decided to put my faith in my house-mate Ryan, half man, half boy, half genius, whose soul mission is to take down this ruthless fantasy pirate.

Sincerely,
Pooty Love

Sportingnews

-Farewell Daunte Culpepper. Your exploits on the field for you last two teams, Oakland and Miami, have gone by the way side, but you will still always be in our hearts for that amazing season in Minnesota when you threw for 4000 yards and helped keep Chris Carter and Randy Moss the best receiving combo to ever play. I think we can all agree that the constant usage of the his trademark 'rollin' hand gesture may have been the karma that caused the knee injuries/inability to come back after forgettable seasons in Miami. Thank you Daunte, Poot's World Salutes you from the confines of the Wakeman household circa year 2000.

- I read a trade proposal on ballhype this morning, Tinsley for Harrington which puzzled yet made me curious to how that would work. Tinsley is one of the PG's I have never seen enough of to know if he is actually done from injury or he can play again, but getting rid of harrington in the new era warriors could be ok, would tinsley give any type of baron presence? poot's... world... radio topic please.

-Sportingnews, the site that has never been seen other than for gambling addicts, Poot, and Mike and I, when basic fantasy calls. Only three trades per season this year! ? uhh, well I guess that means i am counting on Kansas City's D and Randy Moss to cancel each other out.

-Monta talk continues. Abrahsions on leg near site of injury. Monta if 4x4'ing is involved i am not going to be pleased. On a better note Mr. Turiaf likes going to restraunts and is good at "having fun". Ronny we know you are sad about leaving Kobe, but if you gel with this team considering all the spectacular plays that go on every given night, there hopefully will be a higher ratio of dance on sideline to minutes on floor rate which will keep us all happy in spite of the Lakers loss. We'll keep a chart as the year goes on, hopefully along with marcus williams' Assist to Turnover ratio.

I'M BACK!!!!

After a depressingly abysmal conclusion to the NBA finals, I was so embarrassed to live in LA that I was forced to spend the last few months in solitary mediation in a Buddhist temple in highest reaches of Tibet, reflecting on how my inaccurate predictions had tarnished our noble blog and let down our, what must be millions of, readers. But atlas, before I achieved total Enlightenment, I sensed that once again my blogmates needed me. For who else could deliver what promises to be a somewhat shoddy and clearly biased prediction of the Dallas Cowboys' success in the NFC? Well probably either James Owen or Kyle Robinson, but I came back anyways!

My Dallas preview will come shortly, but first there are more pressing matters. In memory of the epic battles of the past, we must once again enter the arena of Salary Cap Fantasy Football! Highlights of those fierce competitions include:

-Alex using all his trades up in first 4 weeks
-Kelsey creating a team and then apparently never even looking at it again
-Nathan clearly not caring nearly as much as Alex and I about our stupid little league, but still doing better than us
-Alex weekly accusing me of copying his players
-The Raging Scallions riding on the shoulders of Peyton Manning and Priest Holmes to victory!

I created a league on SportingNews.com but you guys have precious little time. I emailed you invitations, but in case I used the wrong email addresses, the league is "Poot's World" and the password is "Pooty".

P.S. Nate, I look forward to more "KPOOT Radio: All Pooty, All the Time"!

Efficiency At It's Highest?

How good were the Boston Celtics during the 2007-2008 NBA season? I got to thinking this question when I looked through some of the most efficient games in the last 22 years. Only 3 teams have been able to shoot better than 55% from the field, 70% from downtown, and 100% from the line. Ladies and gentleman I present to you the 2008 TORONTO RAPTORS? Yes, one of the greatest offensive performances in NBA history had Andrea Bargnani, Anthony Parker and Jamario Moon in the starting lineup. What blows my mind even more than this is that the Boston Celtics only lost by 2! The only other 2 times a team was this efficient were in 1994, and 1990 with the Houston Rockets and New York Knicks respectively, and they won by an average of 26 points.




More from me after I watch this game with my own eyes...

1st Quarter:

-Oh this might make some sense, first Raptors possession is a turnover. Not taking shots that eventually miss will help out the percentages in the long run.

-Having not looked at Calderon carefully last year, I can't help but notice how the ball is on a string for this guy. Easy to see why he led the league in assist to turnover ratio. Also, Raptors start game going 5-5 from the field. That'll help the efficiency. TURNOVERS! JESUS CHRIST!

-Its funny, when the Raptors do hit baskets, it is absolutely nothing but net. Splash homies, they haven't even touched the rim.

2nd Quarter:

-I don't know why I didn't check the turnover numbers for Toronto, but that sure explains a lot. Tony Allen nails two shots and Ginger Scally is in the game. Looks like they didn't care at this point of the season.

-Raptors in a slump, down by 10. They must turn it up in second half. Sorry for skipping over Raptors free throws, I know they go 100%.

-A majority of their shots hit are not good shots. They'll dribble drive from well outside the arc and pull up from about 17 feet for a tough fadeaway. They are still going in.

-15-2 run near the end of the half. Calderon is the man, and Parker is on fire hitting from everywhere. 57-55 Raps at the half.

3rd and 4th Quarters:

-Well as it turns out, heavy turnovers + never missing a shot equals the most "efficient" game of all time. It's amazing how it was so unimpressive to accomplish something so amazing. Also, shows how gravy Boston was last year to just barely lose.