Alright Mrs. Campbell, here's my essay. I know I'm a little late, but I've got a good excuse because I've been somewhat busy landing a spacecraft on Mars*. Although I guess I'm more than 10 minutes late so it's technically an absence and I should just go to the office. Oh yeah, since it sounds like Davis isn't going to leave GS, I decided to write about something else.
Soul-Sucking Fiends: The San Antonio Spurs
By Michael Pugh
By Michael Pugh
It's hard to stay very engaged in the playoffs when the exciting teams keep losing. No matter how many times your hear analysts say "defense wins championships," it doesn't make it any easier to accept, and even though I know that they are simply trying to win, and doing an annoyingly good job of it, I find myself channeling all my anger at the Spurs. Watching your favorite teams face the Spurs is like playing Magic cards or boat racing against Jim, there are two inevitable truths: they will beat you, and they will do it in the most unexciting yet effective way. Too many times have I seen San Antonio take my basketball dreams and slowly and methodically grind them to death. Which brings me to my thesis: the San Antonio Spurs are the dementors of the NBA, slowly sucking all the avidity and joy from you until you are left a broken shell of a person, unable to imagine ever enjoying the sport of basketball again.
Rather than writing a body for this essay to back up my claim, I submit only pictural evidence. Below is a picture of Time Duncan hitting that disgusting, pigeon-toed three pointer from an angle you may not have seen before. I believe it speaks for itself.
* Check out this photo. Look at the guy on the far right leaning against the console...it's me! And yes, I did single handedly land the lander on Mars, that's why I'm so prominent in the picture.
Rather than writing a body for this essay to back up my claim, I submit only pictural evidence. Below is a picture of Time Duncan hitting that disgusting, pigeon-toed three pointer from an angle you may not have seen before. I believe it speaks for itself.
* Check out this photo. Look at the guy on the far right leaning against the console...it's me! And yes, I did single handedly land the lander on Mars, that's why I'm so prominent in the picture.
3 comments:
HHAHAHA, i do not see you in the nasa photo mike, but i am sensing that you were being sarcastic. I was just about to yell at you for not providing me with a thesis statement, but then WHAM! it hit me like a ton of bricks nicely towards the end of your paragraph. i think alex will accept your reason for not blogging. i suppose we all can. and i am glad someone else wants to pull out their eyeballs with a spoon when the Spurs are on TV.
OH and if anything crazy is happening on Mars, I expect this blog to be the first one to break the news...this could be our ticket to stardom.
I really am in the photo, although you can barely see me. I'm standing in the upper right corner and kinda in shadows. It looks like I'm pounding the top of the console. I don't think I would have even recognized myself except I know I was standing there when these pictures were taken. Anyways, don't worry Nate, when we make contact with the Martians you'll be the first to know.
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